Worst Announcer

[BBK]

Tell us, Hales

 

[Hawk&Balls]

Write in for Pam Ward

 

[ivan_drago]

It’s dolph but only because he’s a radio guy and by nature has to be better, faster and more detailed - all of which he is none.

Brando sucks as PBP on tv more so because he is an uneducated goof who knows nothing about the sports he is announcing or the teams that are playing.

 

[ddevries]

I’m against the Dolph slander. Listen to more D1 school radio networks and your opinions will change.

 

[Mr. Hawk]

“Kirk Ferentz is a master of the game clock”

“Iowa has an outstanding, athletic center”

 

[Alan Lomax]

I’m against the Dolph slander. Listen to more D1 school radio networks and your opinions will change.

Dolph is in his mid 70s, the play by play game has passed him by, he can’t keep up, can’t pronounce names, and slurs most words. Ed does him no favors.

 

[neshawk]

Iowa's offense makes Ed smoke medicinal Marijuana.

 

[ivan_drago]

I’m against the Dolph slander. Listen to more D1 school radio networks and your opinions will change.

I completely, unequivocally disagree. Basketball? Dolph goes entire segments without telling you the score. Football, he sometimes forgets the down and distance. It makes it unlistenable.

 

[The Dad]

“Kirk Ferentz is a master of the game clock”

“Iowa has an outstanding, athletic center”

Massive troll job. Nothing more, nothing less.

 

[Stu Beagle]

Brando is worse because who the fuck would choose to listen to Dolph unless you are on the road?

 

[Dr. Zaius]

Iza. Gay.

 

[Gushawk]

Kirk’s mastery turns into a pumpkin at the 2 minute mark of each half.

 

[fossilhawk]

Look, Dolph may be a senile old coot who doesn't know first and ten from a jump ball, but he's *our* senile old coot who doesn't know first and ten from a jump ball. (Aside: I'm convinced it would be a radical improvement if he were force-fed about half a bottle of Ten High before going on air, not least because Eddie maintains a standing 0.15 BAC at all times.)

Tim Brando, being an Iowa-hater and a moron, can get fucked with his own microphone.

 

[Geese]

I completely, unequivocally disagree. Basketball? Dolph goes entire segments without telling you the score. Football, he sometimes forgets the down and distance. It makes it unlistenable.

Listened to the Vikings game when they played the Bills and then listened to some of Dolph during the Minnesota game. I was shocked how I always knew the score, down and distance, time on the clock when I was listening to the Vikings game. When I listen to Dolph I end up checking my phone to figure out what's going on.

 

[rodg12]

Dolph is also an awful, awful inteviewer. 5 minute spiels spinning yarns to finally let the interviewee talk. I don't want to hear you talk, Dolph. I want to hear from the person you're talking to.

 

[brantshawks]

Iowa's offense makes Ed smoke medicinal Marijuana.

Luckily he practiced for all of those decades before it was medicinal.

 

[jon_cocktoasten]

Spencer Tillman. Most of what he says about scheme is completely made up nonsense.

 

[L. Wade Childress]

When I am listening to Dolph, I hope a doctor tells me I have stage 4 cancer.

 

[CamelTones]

No one turns more 7 yard first down runs into a 2nd and 6 than Dolph.

 

[Geese]

When I am listening to Dolph, I hope a doctor tells me I have stage 4 cancer.

We also hope a Dr tells you that

 

[BBK]

"HOW DO YOU DO!?!?!"

 

[Thomas Wolsey]

"HOW DO YOU DO!?!?!"

I’ve been better, Tim.

 

[thrawn]

No one turns more 7 yard first down runs into a 2nd and 6 than Dolph.

big hole but it closes down quickly

 

[HiawathaHawk]

I completely, unequivocally disagree. Basketball? Dolph goes entire segments without telling you the score. Football, he sometimes forgets the down and distance. It makes it unlistenable.

He also likes to ramble about some weird detail or what he thought he saw, without telling you the actual result of the play.

 

[ivan_drago]

big hole but it closes down quickly

and he’s knifed down after he jitterbugs his way for a gain

 

[CamelTones]

As much as Dolph struggles, I’m a little terrified of who they will eventually replace him with. I’ve always assumed it would be Brent Balbinot which would not be great.

 

[Dr. Zaius]

Chuck Long

 

[YugoslavianMountainHound]

A bit disappointed no one started a "Wurst Announcer" companion thread.

 

[Kamala]

As much as Dolph struggles, I’m a little terrified of who they will eventually replace him with. I’ve always assumed it would be Brent Balbinot which would not be great.

 

[Kamala]

Why are so many of you listening to Iowa on the radio. Stream it, plug in phone to CarPlay, listen to TV broadcast

 

[CamelTones]

I do a hybrid listen/stream 2-3 times a year. Brent Balbinot would be miserable. At least Dolph isn’t screaming into the mic.

 

[Stu Beagle]

Doing a hybrid sounds miserable

 

[Kamala]

I do a hybrid listen/stream 2-3 times a year. Brent Balbinot would be miserable. At least Dolph isn’t screaming into the mic.

Why?

 

[Geese]

Dug and 26.2 would be a great pair after Dolph and Eddie die.

 

[Kamala]

Dug and 26.2 would be a great pair after Dolph and Eddie die.

Because of their superior ability to stay on topic?

 

[YugoslavianMountainHound]

Dug and 26.2 would be a great pair after Dolph and Eddie die.

"Nice cut back and 8 yard run from Johnson"
"I fucked your wife last night"

 

[RecreationalGynecologist]

I would actually listen to that broadcast.

 

[champion_thedrinker]

Dug and 26.2 would be a great pair after Dolph and Eddie die.

I thought this board was in agreement that women shouldn't be involved in football announcing.

 

[ivan_drago]

"Nice cut back and 8 yard run from Johnson"
"I fucked your wife last night"

“LaPorta with a move that belongs on a poster!”

“Yeah; a poster of a fat Hawk Shop model like your fat fucking wife.”

“They love the Hawkeyes in Breck!”

 

[CamelTones]

Why?

I farm on the side.

 

[Hawkstrat]

It was second and ten for Nebrantska.

"Thompson rolls and completes a short pass."

Long pause.

"First down."

 

[CamelTones]

Steve Lappas

 

[OlePeep]

When Iowa was up 2 late v. Clemson after a Clemson basket and them needing to foul, the color guy said “we need one miss.” Who is “we”, sucka?

 

[TJones3312]

When Iowa was up 2 late v. Clemson after a Clemson basket and them needing to foul, the color guy said “we need one miss.” Who is “we”, sucka?

Whoever they had money on which was hard to tell.

 

[The Dad]

When Iowa was up 2 late v. Clemson after a Clemson basket and them needing to foul, the color guy said “we need one miss.” Who is “we”, sucka?

Openly cheered when Clemson’s last two 3’s fell.

 

[Kamala]

Openly cheered when Clemson’s last two 3’s fell.

Yep, it was like watching a Sox game with Steve Stone or a Rangers game with Sam Rosen. Just openly cheering for one team. Except I’ve never seen Sam Rosen dial down to the on ice refs to change a call.

 

[CamelTones]

Hopefully this ends his chance at the Iowa job some day.

 

[MailmanCliff]

Thank god he was fuckin terrible

 

[Hawkmi]

Hopefully this ends his chance at the Iowa job some day.

He must have really fucked up.

 

[ddevries]

I always thought he was ok on Kakert’s podcast.