Iowa State Football Bashing Thread

[YugoslavianMountainHound]

I know we have the "Soulmate for Iowa pessimists" thread and some miscellaneous ones but we need a quasi-official thread to mock them.

Pandy had an article today alluding to ISU's oline perhaps being the best in the BXII.

Then there's this tweet where you can't get a better dichotomy between the subject line and the dumpy physiques of the picture. Campos' ability to be pudgy at "6'8" is nothing short of amazing.

 

[Malickfan]

 

[Lime]

always worth pointing out that Ricky Stanzi has as many bowl wins (3) in 2.5 years as a starter as their program does in its history.

 

[Gushawk]

I'm torn about participating in this thread, despite my confidence that they'll again be an extremely shitty football team that is near and likely the worst on our schedule. (Thanks, Kirk.)

Fuck them and their likely win over Iowa right in their shit asses.

 

[howler]

always worth pointing out that Ricky Stanzi has as many bowl wins (3) in 2.5 years as a starter as their program does in its history.

Ol' Rick's teams outscored ISU 87-15 in his 3 games between '08 and '10.

 

[HawkLax6]

always worth pointing out that Ricky Stanzi has as many bowl wins (3) in 2.5 years as a starter as their program does in its history.

That was always my favorite, but my new favorite might be that TCU dropped three spots in the CFP poll after winning by only 52 points over Iowa State.

 

[Lime]

always worth pointing out that Ricky Stanzi has as many bowl wins (3) in 2.5 years as a starter as their program does in its history.

That was always my favorite, but my new favorite might be that TCU dropped three spots in the CFP poll after winning by only 52 points over Iowa State.

I have it as co-#1

 

[YugoslavianMountainHound]

always worth pointing out that Ricky Stanzi has as many bowl wins (3) in 2.5 years as a starter as their program does in its history.

That was always my favorite, but my new favorite might be that TCU dropped three spots in the CFP poll after winning by only 52 points over Iowa State.

Paul Rhoads is adamant that shouldn't have happened.

 

[douglasbader]

always worth pointing out that Ricky Stanzi has as many bowl wins (3) in 2.5 years as a starter as their program does in its history.

That was always my favorite, but my new favorite might be that TCU dropped three spots in the CFP poll after winning by only 52 points over Iowa State.

I have it as co-#1

No way. The fact that Ricky Stanzi has as many bowl victories as Iowa State does in their 123 year history is the best thing ever.

 

[KitKatApples]

They also lost to drake in football once.

 

[Talkin' Goat]

They also lost to drake in football once.

And to them in basketball the same year.

 

[Hawk_Kegmasters]

I hope all Cyclones die of the AIDS which they contracted from fats niang.

 

[Gushawk]

It's Tits Niang.

 

[wondergrape]

A funny joke is to refer to the University's hometown as "Lames". Not only is this a clever play on words, but it connotates the degree to which the town is below standard in numerous subcategories.

 

[Tugboat]

Apparently they're heavy on JuCos who previously held big time offers.

I think they'll be better this year than last year.

 

[The Dad]

Apparently they're heavy on JuCos who previously held big time offers.

I think they'll be better this year than last year.

If they are in Ames, they likely profoundly retarded and/or did not live up to their initial offer list.

 

[YugoslavianMountainHound]

Apparently they're heavy on JuCos who previously held big time offers.

I think they'll be better this year than last year.

Well considering they were 2-10 and if Iowa wasn't coached by decaying corpses would have been 1-11, that's not much of a stretch.

If Iowa and UNI can get their shit together this year, ISU has a decent shot of going 0-12. (@Kansas, @Toledo).

 

[eclone]

It's Tits Niang.

Ehh, he's back in summer shape. The tits probably won't be back until about Thanskgiving time.

 

[ISUFan98]

Apparently they're heavy on JuCos who previously held big time offers.

I think they'll be better this year than last year.

Hopefully they're really dumb Jucos who are really good at football. Why they haven't tried to replicate K-State's model all these years is beyond me.

 

[Lime]

Apparently they're heavy on JuCos who previously held big time offers.

I think they'll be better this year than last year.

Hopefully they're really dumb Jucos who are really good at football. Why they haven't tried to replicate K-State's model all these years is beyond me.

seems like they've tried at various points, they just don't have the greatest college football coach in history

 

[Lime]

Apparently they're heavy on JuCos who previously held big time offers.

I think they'll be better this year than last year.

Hopefully they're really dumb Jucos who are really good at football. Why they haven't tried to replicate K-State's model all these years is beyond me.

seems like they've tried at various points, they just don't have the greatest college football coach in history

also, it's probably partly because of K-State's history that top JUCO-type recruits go to KS JUCOs but Kansas has a stronger stable of JUCOs. looking at the last few years, KS usually has 15+ top 100 JUCO recruits (FWIW, K-State gets fewer than 5 these days)

https://rivals.yahoo.com/jcgridiron/football/recruiting/rankings/rank-3508/2015

 

[Verbal]

 

[FrodoTBaggin]

Love that mean fucker.

 

[HCPhawk]

I'll always remember Chris Williams talking down to the NDSU guy in his podcast. His shitty little FCS team had no chance against the mighty Cyclones. It's not like ISU had taken a pretty good beat down by an FCS team the previous year or anything. Then of course after they get curb stomped, NDSU is a juggernaut and would probably finish top 25 BCS. A bunch of homer morons, all of em.

 

[YugoslavianMountainHound]

I'll always remember Chris Williams talking down to the NDSU guy in his podcast. His shitty little FCS team had no chance against the mighty Cyclones. It's not like ISU had taken a pretty good beat down by an FCS team the previous year or anything. Then of course after they get curb stomped, NDSU is a juggernaut and would probably finish top 25 BCS. A bunch of homer morons, all of em.

That podcast may be the greatest thing ever. NDSU guest flat out calls a 20 point win and Williams and his crony go apeshit. 34-14.

 

[Russell Ziske]

always worth pointing out that Ricky Stanzi has as many bowl wins (3) in 2.5 years as a starter as their program does in its history.

Ol' Rick's teams outscored ISU 87-15 in his 3 games between '08 and '10.

Chuck Long's 3 year results vs. ISU are worth mentioning & remembering, as the years pass by.
Ol' Chuck's teams outscored ISU 177-34 in his 3 games between 83' and 85'.

 

[ClintWalker]

Rule # 1.....if you're a defensive player chasing a ball carrier on any kind of miss-direction....better have your head on a swivel.

 

[eclone]

I'm more partial to this one:

although this one is pretty good too:

 

[Hawkstrat]

Thanks, coach.

 

[Russell Ziske]

I'm more partial to this one:

although this one is pretty good too:

Congratulations on the Super Bowl wins.

 

[Hawkstrat]

I feel like it's almost charitable for Kirk to give ISU fans nearly all of their fondest football moments.

 

[ClintWalker]

I'm more partial to this one:

although this one is pretty good too:

Those games are so hard to take not just because Iowa lost to ISU, but because Iowa lost to really bad ISU teams in Kinnick.

 

[FrodoTBaggin]

Kurt is a pathetic pussy.

 

[FrodoTBaggin]

Credit goes to them. That's football.

 

[TH1974]

Peterson: Tucker says Iowa State will 'shock everybody'

http://www.desmoinesregister.com/story/sports/college/iowa-state/randy-peterson/2015/08/09/demond-tucker-confidence-iowa-state-cyclones-big-12-conference/31389927/

 

[L. Wade Childress]

Georges Niang is good for my self-image.

congrats, fatass, you work out all off-season and look slightly better shirtless than this balding nearly 40 year old white dude.

 

[BngHawk]

Peterson: Tucker says Iowa State will 'shock everybody'

http://www.desmoinesregister.com/story/sports/college/iowa-state/randy-peterson/2015/08/09/demond-tucker-confidence-iowa-state-cyclones-big-12-conference/31389927/

By giving up only 49 points a game instead of 56?

 

[nolookpass]

Hard for me to bad mouth a program who pretty regularly beats us home or away

 

[Soda Popinski]

Hard for me to bad mouth a program who pretty regularly beats us home or away

Sure, but feel free to bad mouth their dorky, delusional fans.

 

[Stu Beagle]

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/NCAA_Division_I_FBS_football_win-loss_records

Iowa State #5 all time losses in NCAA history

 

[eclone]

The storied Big 10 with a solid three of the bottom 6 teams of all time.

 

[TH1974]

The storied Big 10 with a solid three of the bottom 6 teams of all time.

Check out the teams with the most wins.

 

[Pseudonym]

PACK THE JACK!!1!!1

 

[C-3PO]

Hey dipshits, this is a thread an ISU turd would start about Iowa.

Let's go back to not giving a fuck about ISU.

Dammit

 

[Matt]

The storied Big 10 with a solid three of the bottom 6 teams of all time.

And Iowa State is a combined 1-8 against those storied Big Ten teams

 

[RecreationalGynecologist]

Sick of losing to

PACK THE JACK!!1!!1

$175? Wow. That's cheap

 

[YugoslavianMountainHound]

Sick of losing to

PACK THE JACK!!1!!1

$175? Wow. That's cheap

Includes a season parking pass, a $100 credit for concessions and a $100 instant rebate.

 

[Lime]

Sick of losing to

PACK THE JACK!!1!!1

$175? Wow. That's cheap

Includes a season parking pass, a $100 credit for concessions and a $100 instant rebate.

you can give the concession credit to Mangino in exchange for the right to call three plays

 

[atemp]

Chuck Long / Hayden Fry teams outscored Iowa State 167 - 34 from 1983 to 1985. Jim Criner had a better winning percentage than Paul Rhoads does currently.

 

[Jimmie Dimmick]

PACK THE JACK!!1!!1

He's right. It is amazing. How can that many people continue to support a terrible product. Are these the people that keep Aldi and TJ Maxx in business?