**Official 2022 Iowa Football Season Thread**

[Mr. Hawk]

This feels like when you sent us looking for some damn image that you wanted.

We are not your staff, sir.

I've never really considered anyone here to be "staff." Minions, perhaps.

 

[newsbreaker]

Body of work?

Body of work!

Either the "body of work" is something other than game results and position performance, or Kirk thinks every single living Iowa fan is a fucking moron.

 

[kmurp]

Let's mix in a water or two today

I thought it was just me. Thanks.

 

[CamelTones]

Kirks done.

 

[Art Vandalay]

You don't get seat numbers until you buy them.

This might be outdated but


Sidelines all have 79 rows
The corner sidelines have approximately 17 seats in a row
The tunnel starts at row 42
There are 28 seats in each row below the tunnel
Above the tunnel, there are 28 seats in a row in MOST sections
There are a few sections with 32 seats in a row,mainly at midfield"

These "few sections with 32 seats in a row" are 105, 106, 126 & 127

 

[The Dad]

Fucking embarrassing.

 

[newsbreaker]

Translation: Because I say so.

 

[Cheer 4 the Hawks!]

For the East stands, the numbers run north to south. For instance, seat 1 in 107 is on the aisle between 106 & 107, seat 28 (or whatever) will be on the south end of each row

 

[MisterFalcon]

Kirk is going to die on the Spencer Petras hill. What the fuck is going on? He talks about the body of work. Yeah, we have eyes. This is the most bizarre shit I've ever seen.

 

[Stu Beagle]

Kirk is worst Qb evaluator of all time. His body of work speaks for itself

 

[Thomas Wolsey]

Kirks done.

I’m out. I will record and hate watch the games Sunday morning, but I would rather go play golf on most Saturday afternoons.

 

[SondyRules]

I’d be on the verge of committing murder if I were Phil Parker.

 

[Debit One]

I understood the John The Criminal thing as it was Todd's son for which he had the blind spot.

This Ferentz/Petras thing is inexplicable.

 

[Debit One]

Honestly, how would you feel right now if you were Petras? You know that there is a group of coaches arguing for your removal, and have to be very well aware of public sentiment.

Wouldn't you be relieved to be benched?

 

[Stu Beagle]

I understood the John The Criminal thing as it was Todd's son for which he had the blind spot.

This Ferentz/Petras thing is inexplicable.

It’s not that much different than giving Vandenburg every single snap in a clear rebuilding year

 

[newsbreaker]

Honestly, how would you feel right now if you were Petras? You know that there is a group of coaches arguing for your removal, and have to be very well aware of public sentiment.

Wouldn't you be relieved to be benched?

Thankfully, he's a kid with a strong mental makeup who handles pressure well.

 

[Stu Beagle]

Fuck Kirk. This is least enjoyable season ever. Fucking retire to senile piece of shit

 

[Saul Berkley]

I’d be on the verge of committing murder if I were Phil Parker.

Clearly, not all coaches are on board with starting Petras.

 

[ivan_drago]

Brian wants to start Padilla. He's being overruled.

 

[MisterFalcon]

Clearly, not all coaches are on board with starting Petras.

Iowa fans are pissed, but can you imagine being on staff and running into that obstinance in the face of all facts. It has to be infuriating.

 

[Saul Berkley]

Iowa fans are pissed, but can you imagine being on staff and running into that obstinance in the face of all facts. It has to be infuriating.

Family dinners must be interesting.

Brian: How is the casserole Dad? I think the peas are cold. You?

Kirk: Well son, I can't make a fair assessment of that until I have had it 103 times. Just too many variables to consider.

Brian: Maybe we should try cooking it longer next time

Kirk: You know, we have only used this recipe and baking temperature two dozen times and it did work that one time so let's base our next meal from the entire body of work. So, let's stick with this one for now and check back in a couple years, son.

 

[Talkin' Goat]

I’d be on the verge of committing murder if I were Phil Parker.

Yeah I’m going to take a wild guess and say he actually would share it if they were unanimous.

 

[Hawkstrat]

Man, that had a real dead man walking feel to it.

Like, hopefully it turns around and we all look like reactionary idiots. But woof.

 

[MikeyJoe]

 

[The Dad]

Clearly, not all coaches are on board with starting Petras.

I know for a fact this is the case. Unfortunately the dipshits behind him aren’t lighting the world on fire either. But at this point it feels like Mahomes couldn’t overtake Spencer. Fuck Kirk.

 

[MikeyJoe]

Brian wants to start Padilla. He's being overruled.

Then he should threaten to quitlololol.

 

[ISUFan98]

Body of work?

Body of work!

Either the "body of work" is something other than game results and position performance, or Kirk thinks every single living Iowa fan is a fucking moron.

His body of work:

 

[Saul Berkley]

I know for a fact this is the case. Unfortunately the dipshits behind him aren’t lighting the world on fire either. But at this point it feels like Mahomes couldn’t overtake Spencer. Fuck Kirk.

Yep. In recent pressers he has stated the following:

"Spencer has credit"
"We look at his resume"

Clearly, once you become the starter, in Kirk's eyes you always remain so. It's weird he doesn't feel that way about other spots.

 

[CleteyColgate]

Yep. In recent pressers he has stated the following:

"Spencer has credit"
"We look at his resume"

Clearly, once you become the starter, in Kirk's eyes you always remain so. It's weird he doesn't feel that way about other spots.

It's also code for "none of Iowa's quarterbacks would even qualify as a backup at UNI"

 

[MisterFalcon]

If this is the route he has chosen, I'm afraid I don't see many more wins on the schedule.

 

[BluesHawk]

That locker room is going to fall completely apart, and I can't believe it hasn't already.

 

[turtley78]

Get him a pre-game Valium, blow-job, and thell him to fuck his feet and dovetail bullshit- and just chuck it to whoever is open

Fire that fuckin’ pigskin!

 

[AZmessDAWG]

That locker room is going to fall completely apart, and I can't believe it hasn't already.

No it’s not.

 

[AZmessDAWG]

All you have to do is rewatch Jack Campbell’s interview.

 

[Alan Lomax]

"I'm the Dad, because I said so." Is no way to run a multimillion dollar enterprise. Spencer was the 110th rated passer last year, and the 103 rated passer in 2020, this year he's dead fucking last. Kirk is as wrong as wrong can be about this.

 

[Geese]

All you have to do is rewatch Jack Campbell’s interview.

What was he going to say? Everyone hates Spence?

 

[AZmessDAWG]

Totally

 

[BluesHawk]

No it’s not.

Is too.

 

[CleteyColgate]

All you have to do is rewatch Jack Campbell’s interview.

Why rewatch that?

 

[The Full Monte]

I know for a fact this is the case. Unfortunately the dipshits behind him aren’t lighting the world on fire either. But at this point it feels like Mahomes couldn’t overtake Spencer. Fuck Kirk.

This weekend I was ridiculed here for suggesting Kirk would rather roll the dice with Spencer than take a guaranteed win with another QB in Saturday’s game. Starting to think that was pretty accurate

 

[RazHawk]

What is Kirk's buyout at this point, if he chooses to take the football program hostage? I hope he sees the light and takes the appropriate action here, but with as much of a stubborn cocksucker as he's being about the QB, imagine if he also decides to take the same approach with his offensive coordinator?

If you don't have a QB on the roster better than Spencer Petras, that alone is a fireable offense.

 

[CleteyColgate]

But at this point it feels like Mahomes couldn’t overtake Spencer.

Hot take

 

[Hawk&Balls]

What is Kirk's buyout

 

[Saul Berkley]

It's also code for "none of Iowa's quarterbacks would even qualify as a backup at UNI"

And whose fault is that?

 

[BBK]

Great football player, but Jack Campbell isn't very bright.

 

[ivan_drago]

I love Kirk Ferentz and always will.

I think it's time for him to hang it up. He's completely out of touch, he's not willing to change, and he does not have the capacity to do this anymore.

 

[Rolo Tomassi]

Honestly, how would you feel right now if you were Petras? You know that there is a group of coaches arguing for your removal, and have to be very well aware of public sentiment.

Wouldn't you be relieved to be benched?

A normal person yes, but we're talking about Petras here.

 

[douglasbader]

For fuck's sake, settle down guys.

Fire Kirk? He should resign?

Lolz. What a bunch of morons. I'm as pissed as anyone but this is just silly.

 

[ivan_drago]

For fuck's sake, settle down guys.

Fire Kirk? He should resign?

Lolz. What a bunch of morons. I'm as pissed as anyone but this is just silly.

How long do you let this shit last? How many games? Serious, honest question.

If Iowa plays like ass and wins 21-7 against Nevada, then goes to Rutgers and loses and is 2-2, and Kirk doesn't change: when?

 

[ivan_drago]

If he wants to stain his legacy with a 4-8 season riding Spencer Petras into the sunset, he's earned the right to do so. I don't have to like it, though.