**Official Iowa vs. Minnesota Football Thread - 2:30pm - FS1**

[Uff Da]

ISU will win to make this even worse

Unlike Iowa, Arizona had no problem in the game

 

[RiotFan]

You can't play MLB at Iowa without memorizing this speech.

 

[douglasbader]

Usually after sitting on an Iowa loss for a few hours and seeing all kinds of other similar or higher ranked teams lose (BYU, Texas Tech, Ole Miss, USC) I end up feeling a lot better.

Nope. Not this time. Actually this feels worse and I'm now completely convinced this is the worst loss collectively in the Ferentz era. Just a wretched shit game that Iowa had to do EVERYTHING in their power to lose AND create another horrible QB situation.

Fuck everything.

 

[CamelTones]

Iowas playing a fuck ton of young guys. It was always gonna be a bit of a roller coaster.

 

[Lee Beevers]

Iowas playing a fuck ton of young guys. It was always gonna be a bit of a roller coaster.

Playing the young guys is fine, surrendering a game they had no business losing is the problem. Honestly, we will probably butt fuck Wisconsin next weekend and that makes it worse.

 

[Hawk&Balls]

Losing today had nothing to do with experience. At least not with being young.

 

[douglasbader]

As tradition, I'm not starting any more game threads this year. @26.2 you got it from here.

 

[Geese]

That's football

snort

 

[ChipHilton]

Playing the young guys is fine, surrendering a game they had no business losing is the problem. Honestly, we will probably butt fuck Wisconsin next weekend and that makes it worse.

I think it would make it better. However, I could imagine the offense not totaling 100 yard on that defense.

 

[The Full Monte]

Playing the young guys is fine, surrendering a game they had no business losing is the problem. Honestly, we will probably butt fuck Wisconsin next weekend and that makes it worse.

Unfortunately, it’s absolutely impossible to rule out losing to any of these remaining teams, or buttfucjijg them by 40 points. There isn’t one of the remaining games in which I think one of those isn’t possible

 

[CamelTones]

I think it would make it better. However, I could imagine the offense not totaling 100 yard on that defense.

Everyone also thought Iowa was going to butt fuck Minnesota after what they did to Washington. Almost every team in college football this year has looked incredible one week then like dog shit the next.

 

[The Dad]

A Hank Brown led offense is not buttfucking any of the remaining teams by 40 points. Every single remaining game will be a coin flip, which is exactly what Kirk wants.

 

[gohawkeyes811]

Usually after sitting on an Iowa loss for a few hours and seeing all kinds of other similar or higher ranked teams lose (BYU, Texas Tech, Ole Miss, USC) I end up feeling a lot better.

Nope. Not this time. Actually this feels worse and I'm now completely convinced this is the worst loss collectively in the Ferentz era. Just a wretched shit game that Iowa had to do EVERYTHING in their power to lose AND create another horrible QB situation.

Fuck everything.

Like an absolute sadist, I re-watched a bit of the game. What a joke. Iowa should have won that game going away, and it was a coaching abomination. Of course the turnovers were brutal, but they still should have won despite the turnovers. Being overly risk averse and still committing turnovers should make one think to change the strategy a bit. Ugh. Such a bummer.

 

[Thomas Wolsey]

A Hank Brown led offense is not buttfucking any of the remaining teams by 40 points. Every single remaining game will be a coin flip, which is exactly what Kirk wants.

Fuck. Double FUCK

 

[Malickfan]

We could have Ben Johnson as offensive coordinator, and Kirk would tone him down.

 

[Uff Da]

Like an absolute sadist, I re-watched a bit of the game. What a joke. Iowa should have won that game going away, and it was a coaching abomination. Of course the turnovers were brutal, but they still should have won despite the turnovers. Being overly risk averse and still committing turnovers should make one think to change the strategy a bit. Ugh. Such a bummer.

Kirk has a thought on how games should be played. Wants a QB they can control. Watching the first half showed why they didn't want to play Hecklinski, who makes terrible decisions and is not very accurate.
Being overly risk averse makes the mistakes even more painful and impactful as we saw yesterday.
Kirk is already excited for next week, another game that makes him happy regardless of the outcome.

Trying to remember, was there something with how Stanley played that broke Kirk? seems like it has just been a complete train wreck since then. Gronowski was not really a QB, just a good football player.

Still don't understand how they thought Brown and Hecklinski could possibly be options for a P2 team. That said, QB play is pretty average around CFB.

 

[BBK]

We laid a turd yesterday.

I think the rest of the reason will have us looking back at this game and wondering what might have been

 

[Shawneemicks]

Unless they’re able to run for 150+ the offense is going to look like shit. The OL Is definitely the most disappointing part of this team. Winter & Dotzler are not starters.
The final five games will all be dogfights, with at least two more losses, probably three.
The signs were all there week two.

 

[HerkyHopeful]

The number of times the QB has to step up in the pocket due to pressure from whomever is rushing on Dotzler is concerning

 

[The Dad]

Not having the threat of QB run in the year 2026 is malpractice.

 

[Hawk&Balls]

What is OL next year going to look like? Seems like the 2 deeps is all 3-4 year guys that I've never heard of. Hopefully they have a bunch of second year guys ready to start next year.

 

[HCPhawk]

That was the worst performance I've seen in a long time. It truly took quite an effort to lose that game. Once again the offense is shit. Washington is the outlier, not the norm. Once again we have QBs who couldn't start for Middle Tennessee State. Once again when the program has momentum, and looks like it could finally break through and become a contender for once, we get a steaming pile of shit like yesterday.

At the end of the year it will be "Almost! Golly Gee a few things go different and well, it would have been different!" And that's all it will ever be. Almost. That's the ceiling under Kirk.

 

[FrodoTBaggin]

The second drive looked great, Heck throwing good accurate balls... then the pick.

 

[Laplace]

Thats the thing that drove me nuts. With Heck at least we were moving the ball. Red zone turnovers suck, but them getting the ball on their own 2 isnt the worst thing in the world. Hank and his little 2 yard passes to the TE or throwing it to a TE over the middle into double or triple coverage... it's like they knew exactly what he is capable of (or not).

 

[douglasbader]

It's fucking hilarious, looking back they didn't even give Hecklinski a full half in his first start as the declared starter. Pulled him in a tie game in the second quarter and put in Brown who has a ridiculous looking first drive where he was turning and firing the ball without looking, then a terrible incompletion where it looked like his shoulder was fucked. Comes in the second drive and looks drunk and has the most ridiculous INT you've ever seen that was 1000% on him and far dumber than Heck's INT.

Second half he looks far worse (and injured) than Hecklinski, fumbles the ball, should have had 2 more INT's and then finally throws another INT and they "never seriously considered pulling him" until he finally lucks into a Tony Diaz miracle.

I don't know who's dick that Hank Brown sucked, but that boy must suck one hell of a dick.

 

[snips]

everything is gay

 

[Shawneemicks]

RB was looked at like a strength as well. Besides kamari those guys are very average. I’d probably go with Williams the most and just run everything straight downhill. Maybe Jackson on 3rd downs. Phillips was way overvalued

 

[gohawkeyes811]

It's fucking hilarious, looking back they didn't even give Hecklinski a full half in his first start as the declared starter. Pulled him in a tie game in the second quarter and put in Brown who has a ridiculous looking first drive where he was turning and firing the ball without looking, then a terrible incompletion where it looked like his shoulder was fucked. Comes in the second drive and looks drunk and has the most ridiculous INT you've ever seen that was 1000% on him and far dumber than Heck's INT.

Second half he looks far worse (and injured) than Hecklinski, fumbles the ball, should have had 2 more INT's and then finally throws another INT and they "never seriously considered pulling him" until he finally lucks into a Tony Diaz miracle.

I don't know who's dick that Hank Brown sucked, but that boy must suck one hell of a dick.

The only thing I can think of is that Heck was disobedient on the play calls in some way or something dumb like that. And Hank is loyal. But someone said he checked to a run on a 3rd and 5 or whatever and mid field. So it that's it, it makes no sense.

LOL at anyone thinking that this is some sort of equal opportunity between the two. And Heck's "fucking jump" 100% was problematic for him, no question. Not like we have any sort of history with shit like this...

 

[douglasbader]

everything is gay

This is everything that makes Kirk Ferentz and Iowa Football completely insufferable. He's had 7 years to fix the QB situation and it's only gotten worse or at best stayed terribly shitty.

Now as a fan there is again no end in sight to it either and no hope. They've publicly declared they are somehow broke and can't afford to pay for a QB, so the only option is these two shitty ratfuck retarded QB's. Of course they can't even consider playing the 3rd string guy because he's a 2nd year player with no experience and the supposed great next guy up is a true freshman that they won't dare trust for another 2 years minimum. It goes without saying though, because Iowa is so "risk averse" we won't have a fucking clue if Bessinger or Sullivan is any good or if they also fucking suck until at least the year 2028 because Iowa won't dare play either of them.

By the way, how are they broke? Iowa makes a shit ton of revenue and the stadium is sold out. Maybe get rid of the 7 or 8 analysts like Chandler or Moore that are sucking up hundreds of thousands of dollars to do what appears less than nothing. Maybe have Kirk donate one of his $7.5m back to the program so you can take it and get a QB with a pulse.

 

[Kerky]

Everyone also thought Iowa was going to butt fuck Minnesota after what they did to Washington. Almost every team in college football this year has looked incredible one week then like dog shit the next.

It really seems that this is more the case this year than ever before. As you say a lot of teams look like world beaters one week and dog shit the next including Iowa. I would not be surprised to see the script flipped again next week with Iowa focused and kicking ass while Wisconsin has a hangover from their west coast trip.

 

[maxinquaye]

Under Ferentz we have almost always been terrible after a bye week.

 

[The Dad]

On Hank’s INT before half, if the DL didn’t get it, the LB was. It was a pure pants shitting moment.

 

[Kerky]

We laid a turd yesterday.

I think the rest of the reason will have us looking back at this game and wondering what might have been

Just like most seasons.

 

[Debit One]

I'm ready to throw in with Sullivan to see if he's a viable candidate for QB next season.

I already have my answer about Hank, and Hecklinski won't meet Kirk's requirements.

 

[gohawkeyes811]

I'm ready to throw in with Sullivan to see if he's a viable candidate for QB next season.

I already have my answer about Hank.

NO way. It's just too risky.

We need more games like yesterday.

 

[gohawkeyes811]

Ohio State saw their backup QB in the game for a few drives and within days after Sayin was ruled out, said "fuck this, it's an open competition now". I know they are more skilled, but the point is the game performance is what mattered.

Iowa still somehow relies on practice performance as if that is any sort of indicator. It's batshit crazy. Some guys have it, some guys flat out don't.

 

[The Dad]

Hot tip - the supposedly “great next guy up” won’t be.

 

[douglasbader]

"We're broke! No money for a QB!"

Hey, check out the 3,487 assistant coaches and analysts on the sideline and in the booth, each of them making $100k+ to waddle around the sidelines and point at stuff. Have you seen our 85 year old team mascot that the head coach decided to give a charity salary and benefits to? He shows up at 3am every day, we don't know why because nobody else is even here for 3-4 more hours after that, but hey, why not give the old codger a bunch of money to roam the hallways talking to himself?

You guys see Scott Chandler? He was hanging around the facility for free coaching 1A high school football, so we decided to give him a bunch of money to sit next to Tim Lester and help him, because of course an OC making $1.3m needs a few more paid salary guys around him to help him call his shitty plays.

I love college football and college sports, but based on the idiotic way the support staff and coaches and analysts have grown in the last decade, sort of hope it collapses on itself. Everyone is making a gigantic pile of TV money and ticket revenue has never been higher, yet everyone is totally broke.

Somehow Hayden Fry and Lute Olsen and Tom Davis and Young Kirk were all able to run programs and win a ton of games with 10% of the current staff, but it's just impossible to exist in modern college athletics without 5,000 coaches and analysts.

 

[douglasbader]

I'm ready to throw in with Sullivan to see if he's a viable candidate for QB next season.

I already have my answer about Hank, and Hecklinski won't meet Kirk's requirements.

Exactly this. It is what any sane and rational person would do. You see that your first 2 options at QB suck donkey dick and aren't sustainable for the rest of the season and next year. You have a 2nd year QB that seems to have some talent, get him in the game and see what he is capable of.

Not at Iowa. Zero chance that Sullivan ever sees the field other than extreme mop up time. Too risky! He might not know Tim Lester's extensive route trees!

 

[Verbal]

It really seems that this is more the case this year than ever before. As you say a lot of teams look like world beaters one week and dog shit the next including Iowa. I would not be surprised to see the script flipped again next week with Iowa focused and kicking ass while Wisconsin has a hangover from their west coast trip.

Wisconsin’s game was in Madison last night.

 

[Shawneemicks]

It’s the OL

Everything is no better than average because of that.

 

[douglasbader]

 

[gohawkeyes811]

It’s the OL

Everything is no better than average because of that.

I do agree with this to a certain extent. The QBs still obviously suck. But it would be less glaring with a better OLine. Which is inexcusable at Iowa.

 

[Shawneemicks]

Next year?!! Oh boy that OL is gonna be a mess

 

[Shawneemicks]

Hawthorn is a fucking stud. Great player

 

[douglasbader]

"We're broke!!!!"

Gee, now I see why you're broke. You totally needed all these people to score 10 whole fucking points against Minnesota yesterday. If you had only half of these jokers, you might have had enough money to pay a QB and score 17 points and win the game.

 

[douglasbader]

59 full time employees on that list. FIFTY FUCKING NINE!!

 

[BBK]

Hey, check out the 3,487 assistant coaches and analysts on the sideline and in the booth, each of them making $100k+ to waddle around the sidelines and point at stuff. Have you seen our 85 year old team mascot that the head coach decided to give a charity salary and benefits to? He shows up at 3am every day, we don't know why because nobody else is even her for 3-4 more hours after that, but hey, why not give the old codger a bunch of money to roam the hallways talking to himself?

This whole paragraph

 

[douglasbader]

I love Tom Moore. Great Hawkeye. He's 85 years old and made a ton of money. He's on medicare. Do you really have to pay him? Fine if he wants to show up and help, but let him volunteer.

I don't want to pick on him, but he's the easiest and most obvious example of waste and bloat at the college football level. The entire system has deluded itself into thinking this is the way forward. Endless exponentially growing staffs, exponentially rising ticket prices and concession prices, endless begging for donations all so you can turn around 5 minutes later and tell fans with a straight face that you're broke and can't afford to pay a QB. It's madness.

 

[L. Wade Childress]

The second drive looked great, Heck throwing good accurate balls... then the pick.

I wonder if giving him the clear #1 reps would have helped or hurt his reads and timing with that group?

nah, let’s spilt time and make sure they both are as bad as possible!